I think I'm with someone only because I don't want to be alone. I care about them a lot, but I am nervous because the life they led before me was a bit wilder, crazier and something I don't want. I think the right thing to do is go separate ways, but I hold back from leaving..... Is it better to be with someone you love that loves you today or should you make decisions based on an inevitable future...

I think I may be falling for a girl. I'm a girl.

She's really funny and nice and we've kissed a lot.

I've never enjoyed kissing until now.

I am so confused.

GRRRRRRRRRRR. My father drives me absolutely nuts. To the point, really, where I can't stand him. My boyfriend and a few other people I know have lost their fathers, so yes, I know I'm lucky to even have one and should just appreciate it. Also the reason I don't bitch about this to anyone, so I thought this would be a good outlet.

I am so sick of being made to feel so guilty that I'm better off than my parents (just by my dad, my mom is happy for me). It doesn't matter how many times I tell him I don't make as much money as he thinks I do, he still insists on making me feel guilty for ever purchase and everything I've gotten. And it's not like I skimp on presents and stuff for my family - I don't, at all! It's just that I don't get them one of everything I get myself. I get a new car (used, but new for me)? He makes a comment about how nice it must be to be able to afford that. I get a new pair of shoes? My mom would probably really enjoy a pair too. I go out to eat? It'd be nice if the family could go, too.

My family isn't living on the street or struggling to eat or anything. They just don't have the newest and nicest of everything. And I don't either! I make just enough that I can treat myself once in a while, but I can't afford to buy them a new car or new house or all new wardrobes, which my father seems to think I should be doing.

I know this doesn't sound like much, but year after year after year it's become so draining.