Over the past few years that I've been with my bf, I've completely alienated all my friends, because we were always with his friends and because my friends weren't great fans of his. Now I'm miserable with him and want nothing more than to see one of my old friends again....it's completely my fault and I'm not looking to be blamed, since I know I did it. I just needed to write it out, in my own words and with my own fingers, and see it in front of my eyes. I ruined my life for a guy I don't love. I don't know if I'll ever be able to forgive myself.

I want to leave my husband, but I don't because it'd just be too complicated right now. The kids house, the cars, the dog...so instead I've just accepted my life of unhappieness and mediocrity. I don't love him anymore, but he hasn't noticed. I fake my way through the time we spend together and go to bed miserable every night.